mr may!

its finally may!!! im finally passing out ! finish this course .... that i hope to finish long ago .. a qualified diver to dive the deep blue sea!!! finally ..... it has come to this point .... haha.. ive been thru so many things further more i grown up ... life is really interesting and full of surprise hahaha ...... i wish to learn and experience more ! i wan to make my life fun ... i wanna learn more new skill .. more more ... learn more! but first... its time to book in le :( lol
may 18 ... mr diver is born! cant wait to jump off the jumptower with my no.3 and receive my diver badge :D ... HOOOYA

ITS APRILS!!! FOOL of the month !!! lol

4 days into april already .. cant wait ...seriously ! this month is my last month as a trainee and i seriously cant wait to past out from diveschool with my friends and just the HMS terror tower with a HOOOOYAAAAA with my parent and friends that i hope to invite ! hahaha kind of excited about it ... but now is new equipment phase with alot more danger then the previous one.. and seriously i worry will or can i make it thru ? lol ... hope is a accident free month ! i wan none of my batchboys to get injury ! now further more we were split to even smaller groups and that my 2 best friends are gonna go a different path from me le ... sad .. i still see them every day but we are 2 different unit lol .... y like that ? i so sad :) haha ... 1 more month only .... these past time ... its so meaningful to go thru with all of them and to know all of them .... i wonder wat will life be after passout ? ... follow by NDP training! will i get to participate ? lol ... wearing number 1 ! ....i miss those days i spent going out with my friends so long ago ... supper ~ MOS burger ~primary sch outing ... working ... random days event and them .. everyone of them!

diary

starting to make back into my blog ... i've left it too long already .. dusty and old .. need to clean liao lol ... this week was fun as there isnt much training due to the setting up of the biathlon .. took us so many days to set and only take hours to finish -_- lol.. during the days did diving to 10 m depth and felt sharp pain .. for my first time ... as i worry for if im fit to dive haha ... i dunno when or which day i accidentally delete all my inbox smses .. was quite sad as my memories to keep of my NS hardest life went into a total blank :( .... this week damn sian .. sat book out and sunday book in ... lol PTP lol sian hahaha wheres my off day !! lol biathlon was a success lol first time fill cups for non stop lol .. CRAZY lol .... wondering shld i take part next year ? lol .... monday will be 30 m dive.. hopfully it will go pass smoothly :) ... huat ar !
yesterday went IT fair haha buy untill happy ... hellweek backpay is here !! 1.6 is just so enough to make me feel happy in spending hahaha .... booking in soon :( ... off to pack

Then month of march

another month have passed ... so far eh ? im into my last 2 months of course as a diver .. hahaha for the past few months i've been thru alot ,i've learn alot ,feel alot ,suffer alot and i've lost alot ..so by the end of the day .. i wondered ? wats the point of army ? wats the point of training day and night for weekdays ? going thru all this so call 'i dont think i will survive thru' training ? wats that point man ? half my friends were out of the course now .. still 2 months to continue .. im walking like its no end. in last month .. many things happened .. the learning of new skills , the moving of new block ,new room , new room mate ..everything new ... its like a hint to me that my life have move on to a new phase ,everything is new hence i'll have to start anew haha. whereever passed is past ... its behind now .. wat i see now is the road infront of me awaiting for my arrival .. life have changed so much so since i entered NS ,and that im back to single haha ..somehow some i sometime now will have the i dunwanna be alone at home feeling more haha... friends out there i miss u all .. army is a no life place.. u guys make my life ... i shld learn to treasure peoples more eh ? but where to start from ..?hmmm can anyone teach me ? im too used to being alone le O.o ...
this week the PTPs enlisted ... it just reminds me of the OLD days :( when i was still a ptp ... i seriously miss those days when everyone willing to and works together ... and that shes surporting me ... those are really memories .. the time when i tot ,will i go thru PTP ? lol and then i went thru BMT ,PCP and wow last phase of my course... but alot alot have changed ....
the batch ?? no longer is so small
the attitude ?? no longer is there
my surport?? no longer is here
my life ?? no longer the same
the feeling ?? no longer the same
so many of my friends .. out ...
all these .. i dun wan ... i maybe only hoped for a simple life .....??? or not ??? puzzle ....

the early morning

pieces by pieces putting into the picture ... i sense a fear in my heart .... wats making it and wats causing it ? such feeling just come without warning ,hiting straight to the ground .... i feel trembles in my body .... wats gonna come? how's its gonna be ? will.. it ? ..or thats it .? my body is slowly crumbling ... i lose control of my body condition ... will i survive ? going thru ..... everyday looking at my cupboard ... motivates me ... lesser ... the life ... nv change ... the task always the same ..the demand also so high ..breathless is nearly i felt .... those of beside me ... pillar to me... without .... i wont be standing ... and day passes ... i hope is just blinks ... end the suffers .. end my fear ... my uneasiness .... ... to be or not to be ? who can ans me ?
ICSTOY.....AIRMI......LYA .........